Posts

Showing posts from February, 2011

It's been awhile...

Image
My life lately has looked alot like this (mid-terms next week). My house (which I hate <-- long story) is looking like this. via I haven't been cooking much because, well no time. My little Mercedes needs a haircut so bad, she can barely see. I'm such a mess lately :( Things that are important to me: 1. Have kids soon (medically important) 2. Raise my children (no daycare) 3. Do something I love (i.e. cakes) 4. Finish school (3 more classes!) 5. BE HAPPY! Every single thing on my list seems unattainable. I'm unhappy with Mr. P lately. I want my own place. He had the house before me and it's become such a burden for both of us. It's too big to keep clean, the yard is too big to manage and the mortgage is too expensive. Everyday I come home, I'm reminded of how unhappy I am with my life and goals. I'm working on school and almost finished. Everything else is way off in the distant future. Mr P and I are on such rocky ground lately because of the house. He...

At least I get to bring home my homework

Image
The weekly benefit of being a pastry arts student, is that I get to bring home food/pastries/desserts almost weekly. Whatever we make in class (1) goes to the restaurant and the remains is divided between the group :) The joys of college. (Yep, I made that) This weekend, I took some time to start a search of looking at condos. I don't know if Mr. P will be included in this decision and right now I am just looking out for my best interest. Of course other factors are playing into my search (such as breaking up our girls). I know ultimately, it comes down to what is best for myself. My attitude lately has been horrible and I'm trying to work on it. I've started slowly working with a realtor and trying to get motivated with my homework for school and getting everything I need to done. I've decided next semester I will only be a part-time student. Full-time with a job is exhausting and not what I'm cut out for. If it takes me an extra semester or two to graduate, so wha...

It never ends

Image
via My life is too busy for me. School, work, sleep, eat, dogs. Everyone tells me I'm young and I can handle it, but can I? I'm 24 years old and I have health issues :( My body hurts most days when I get out of bed (sometimes while in it). I have anxiety issues to the max. I take things one at a time and try to stay calm and get to the next issue/problem/hiccup. I keep a positive attitude, despite being widowed at 20. Despite losing my son at 19.  My latest problem has become my current relationship. It has become more trouble and disappointment than a positive part of my life. Money has become an issue, time has become an issue, who wakes up first in the morning has become an issue. My mom is taking me to look at condos this weekend. I can not keep living in the situation I am in. I have spent the last 2 years of my life hoping things would fall into place for what I want/need, but they have not. I don't want to sit around and waste more of my time being unfulfilled. It...